Runners

Everyone wants to be, already is, or has been famous. Debora Quake is famous. Clinging on to her youth, decaf latte and just about anyone she can get her hands on as she stumbles her way through presenting the nation’s ailing television breakfast show: Breaking Fast. The show’s ratings, like her career, are on the decline yet it is only her and her accomplice, Norwich Parker, the show’s production manager who won’t wake up and smell the coffee. Norwich doesn’t wake up at all, which for those that know her and her archaic views, isn’t always a bad thing. It is down to Duncan, his two best friends, and the rest of the studio show runners, to ensure Debora is TV-ready each morning no matter what she quite literally throws at them. Overworked, overtired and underpaid, the runners strive for satisfaction elsewhere whilst meeting the world’s elitists in entertainment along the way. Some even find love.

The Baker's Dozen: Twelve Bedtime Stories for Naughty Boys, Wayward Girls and Furry Friends

Enter the extravagant world of naughty children, school bullies and nerds, fancy cats, dirty dogs, world-record holding bubble blowers, showoffs, scary teachers, hypochondriacs, lost beloved bunnies, annoying little brothers, funky potions, heroes that come in all shapes and sizes and more.

You may just find that these larger-than-life characters remind you of someone you know, maybe even a little of yourself!

Read at your own risk: you must know that you may laugh aloud, so be prepared to have a tissue ready or even a spare pair of undies at your disposal. Do the good guys always win? You’ll just have to wait and see.

Sit on mum and dad’s knee, or maybe your older brother and sister, and turn the pages if you dare to enjoy the playful and joyous rhyming tales.

The Bott Twins: Birth, Death and Other Jokes

A grotesque, surreal and darkly comic series of tales about the most terrible family on the planet.

Mrs Bott, an horrendous “unlanced boil” of a woman and Mr Bott, “a balloon of a man”, are very unhappily married.

Into this disaster enter two unwanted arrivals: The Bott Twins.

Born bad? Or driven bad? It doesn’t matter. What you do need to know is that:

“If you ever meet the Bott Twins, run. Run and don’t look back.”

Too few people take this advice and the results are not pretty.

The Cats' Book of Christmas Carols

We cats truly enjoy Christmas activities, such as opening presents when you are out and re-arranging decorations, even at the top of the tree.

We also love carol singing and have our own words. Jan Stewart, who understands and speaks a little MEOW, has kindly written down our most popular lyrics.  

You may sing the human version or practise cat language by repeating our favourite word, ‘meow’, in time to the music. But do listen as you do so, for somewhere nearby, a cat may be joining in the chorus.

Mik and Milly

Mik and Milly follows the story of Mik, the coolest kid at Gumnut International Boarding and Day College, who finds himself facing a daunting challenge after his best friend Milly receives devastating news from her parents on the other side of the world. As mid-year school holidays approach, Mik decides to take Milly on a road trip of a lifetime to the Australian outback. However, an unexpected event at an abandoned mine on his mate’s sheep farm alters their journey forever.As they return to school, Mik and Milly look forward to their annual International Food Festival. The student planning committee decides the festival’s entertainment, and they choose to pit the teachers against the students for the first time ever. But as they prepare for the festival, Mik and Milly begin to wonder if their beef stroganoff secret recipe may be too much for the intimidating Principal Povlov to handle.Will Mik and Milly’s friendship withstand the challenges they face throughout the year, or will their experiences change the way they feel about each other forever? Mik and Milly is a heartwarming and engaging tale that takes readers on a journey through the highs and lows of adolescence, friendship, and growing up.

The Curious Mr. Gahdzooks and his Cautionary Tales for Naughty Children

When children misbehave, when they do not do as they're told, then usually in this day and age, they'd get away with a small telling off. However, a new reason for good behaviour has emerged from the imagination. He is fair and he is kind and just, children have no need to be scared. He is only interested in the ones who don't follow the rules, so naughty children, please be prepared.

Please Understand Me

This book uses Dr. John Gray’s metaphor of men being from Mars and women from Venus to explore the often humorous yet sometimes stressful dynamics of parenthood. From conception to childrearing, this witty and light-hearted compendium dives into the differences in parenting ideologies between men (Martians) and women (Venetians).

The book highlights how an ‘alpha mum’ with high expectations of motherhood can amplify these differences, especially when emotions are processed differently between genders. Drawing on personal experiences and observations of other couples, Beamon presents a dad’s perspective, offering insight into how fathers attempt to live up to their partners’ expectations while keeping a smile through the challenging moments every parent will recognise.

Whether managing through empathy or a lighter touch, this book offers relatable laughs and reflections on the universal journey of raising a child.

Percy the Plastic Bag

Percy is a proud plastic bag and wants to work hard, and he loves to carry things for people. After leaving the Feed Me Supermarket, Percy is happy to be heading out to have a life of usefulness. Unfortunately, things don’t work out quite the way he thought they would. After Percy helped carry some cupcakes to the fete at the village green, things take a terrible turn for the worse, and Percy finds himself in all sorts of trouble. Plastic pollution is having a serious effect on our environment and wildlife. This story is about the travels of some plastic characters who find themselves going from being useful to no longer needed and getting themselves into all sorts of difficulties. It is both funny and sad and is written in a way to highlight awareness to single-use plastic. Have you ever wondered what really happens to some plastic after it is used and no longer needed? Where does it go and how does it get there? Through the eyes of the plastic characters and their humorous and tragic adventure, it is hoped in a fun way, to bring a greater understanding to children about the responsibility we have to protect our world against plastic waste.

Alfie and the Evil Pie King

Mr Muddles was the most evil tycoon that ever lived. He had the biggest pie-making empire in the world!One dark rainy night, he sneaks into London Zoo and unlocks the cages of every animal!Will he capture the animals and mince them up into a best-selling pie recipe of all time? Or will the animals escape into London and take over the country?Can Alfie, an otherwise average boy, succeed in the impossible act of...rescuing the animals? Will our villain be captured? Let your imagination do the talking as you immerse yourself into the colourful and chaotic world of Alfie and the Evil Pie King.In this original and imaginative children’s story, accomplished writer and storyteller, Kirsten-Jessica Lloyd, hooks the reader into a world of humour, with vibrant themes and compelling storytelling, bringing characters to life.

Baby Boom Is in the Room

Raymond Kay is 1 today.He is an ordinary baby in every way.Except late at night, alone in his room.Where he becomes DJ ‘Baby Boom’!With records spinning and music pumping.He soon gets everyone dancing and jumping!BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!You are never too small to dream BIG!

Grumpy Stories

Ron Hicks presents a series of fun, imaginative children's tales!In Chuckles the Car, the title character is sad because he's old and rusty. But is speed and beauty all it's cracked up to be?A Tail of Sammy Squirrel follows the mischievous Sammy's mission to get past the big dogs in the garden to reach the acorn tree.Meanwhile in Rip the Beagle, the puppy is very bored. All of his brothers and sisters have disappeared! Will he be next? And where will he end up?

Princesses Wear Pants

From her nose to her toes,

Our little Princess grows.

But as she gets bigger,

Her mum needs to help her figure.

That bottoms should be hidden

By some pretty pants, maybe with a ribbon.

But our princess is happy,

Young, carefree and a little sassy.

We won’t be too hard,

And we love her spirit for disregard.

So celebrate her carefree ways,

And let’s embrace our little princess days.